The Sunshine Has Graduated!

Tonight, we honored a very special individual who just graduated. I count him a good friend, and I’d like to dedicate this evening to him. Sunshine.

Sunshine, human reasoning says that nobody should have to go through the things you and your family have endured over the past couple years. But we know that as God-follows, human reasoning doesn’t rule – divine wisdom does.

Like Job of old, it has not been told to you why your mom got cancer and died. It’s not been told why you have not experienced a “normal” childhood and home life. But divine wisdom says “I simply trust God for those details”, and like Christ’s disciples, Jesus simply says, “follow Me.”

Sunshine, there was no big fanfare for your graduation, and nobody gave you a challenge as you embark on the next part of your life – adulthood. I personally know what it’s like to miss having the normal graduation ceremony and challenge, and I don’t want you to look back on your graduation with sadness like I do mine.

Therefore, I’d like to offer a personal challenge as you move forward in life. I know that you’ll still be in the youth group for the next couple months, but you just graduated, and that’s a very special thing!

My challenge to you is this:

1. Never forget the godly example of your mother. The best way to remember her is to adopt her principles as your own. When it comes to selecting someone to model your spiritual life after, you can’t do much better than your mother!
2. Be sure to not repeat the same mistakes of your parents. All parents make mistakes – there’s nothing you can do about those of your parents. However, the best thing you can do is to not repeat them when you establish your own home.
3. If God wants you to get married, find a wife that will love you and God unconditionally. A wife that loves you above all others, and loves God more than that will change your life forever!
4. Create your “normal” life. Although you haven’t experienced a normal home life, you can create an above-normal life in your own home that will make a huge impact on your wife and kids. Shelter them, protect them, love them, provide for them, be there for them and listen to them.
5. Remember that each aspect of your life affects your life as a whole. Keep the proper balance in your time, money, relationships, work and ministry. Don’t get so caught up in fulfilling “the American Dream” that you forget about what’s really important – faith, family and friends.
6. Establish the habit of spending personal time with God. Make your faith an integral part of your life. Call upon God frequently. Don’t merely read His Word…study it and apply it.
7. 1st Timothy 4:12 says, “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.” Ryan – don’t despise what’s happened in your youth. Instead allow it to make you a better man so you can continue to be an example of the believers, and point others to Christ.

Blind Spots

Psalm 19:12b, “…cleanse thou me from secret faults.”

If you’re familiar with driving, you’ve probably heard the term “blind spot”. When you’re in the drivers seat, and you look into your side mirror, then you look over your shoulder, there’s a sliver of area that you are still not able to see. This is called a “blind spot”, and whatever lies in this area is potentially very dangerous…especially if it’s another vehicle that’s in the lane you want to turn into!

Last year at The Wilds Camp, we had a morning session for youth workers taught by the camp director Ken Collier called “Open My Eyes to the Blind Spots”. It was very eye opening because he revealed that we ALL have areas in our lives which we are not able to see, but that someone else needs to point out these blind spots.

Have you ever heard someone say something so profound that you think, “whoa, that was deep!”? Something Brother Collier said hit me like this. Here it is…"In the area of your greatest strength lies the potential for your greatest weakness."

What is your greatest strength? Some strengths are gentleness, dynamic personality, spiritual leader, sacrificial serving, organizer, great friend, etc.

I’ll use myself as an example to explain what this means. I believe one of my greatest strengths is “organization”. I’ve been told that I’m very good at organizing things, and planning the details of events, projects, etc. So according to his statement, if I want to find my potentially greatest weakness, I need to look at this strength. It didn’t take me long to identify my weakness! My weakness in this area is that I’m very impatient with others who aren’t organized, or with people who don’t plan things like I would. I get frustrates when things don’t go well due to poor organization & planning.

For me, this impatience is one of my blind spots, and I need to be careful to guard against this.

How can you find out if you have blind spots? You might have a blind spot if…
1. You see the same weakness in everyone else. Maybe the problem isn’t everyone else, maybe it’s you! (Example…”All guys are such jerks.” If you see the same weakness in all guys, maybe the problem isn’t with all guys, maybe the problem is your outlook on life!)
2. You try to be a leader, and people don’t want to follow. Maybe there’s a problem with your leadership style that others see, and you don’t see.
3. People are hesitant to talk with you about problem areas in your life because you’re so defensive. Eventually, they give up trying, and hope you fail so you’ll be taught a lesson.
4. You sense that people push against you in certain areas.
5. People say that you are either unbending or unbalanced. Many people believe that you are this way on purpose; whereas, you don’t realize that you’re like this.
6. People avoid you at certain times or in certain settings.
7. Family members have adjusted to you, lost respect for you, and are bitter against you. It’s wrong when people need to adjust to my sin!

If you suspect that there is a blind spot in your life, the first step is to admit you might have a problem. Don’t act like you’re above having problems, and deal with them head-on.

Romans 12:3, “For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.”

1 Peter 5:5b-6, “…for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble. Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:”

Take the “2-Friend Approach”:
Your closest Friend, Jesus is ready to help you. Go to Him and…
1. Humble yourself and ask Him to show you any blind spots.
2. Assume that there is at least one blind spot in your life.
3. Blame on one. This is no time to be defensive with God or man.
4. Confess all you know about the blind spot, and make restitution as necessary.
5. Respond immediately in obedience to that which God reveals to you.
6. Study the Bible about your blind spot to gain wisdom about it.

Find a close friend (either another teen or an adult that you can trust) and ask that person these questions:
1. What is the most obvious thing about me that troubles other people?
2. Is there an area of my life that you have wished you could have talked to me about, but you were afraid I might not understand or be hurt or defensive?
3. I have a blind spot. I believe it is in the area of ___________, but I’m not sure. I know it’s there, but I can’t see it clearly and deal with it. If you can help me, I can get started on solutions.
4. I want to become more like Christ. What do you see in my life that keeps me from doing this?
Please keep me accountable in this area, and pray for me.

Psalm 19:12b, “…cleanse thou me from secret faults.” EVEN THE ONES THAT I’M NOT AWARE OF!

Loneliness

Psalm 102:1-7, “Hear my prayer, O LORD, and let my cry come unto thee. Hide not thy face from me in the day when I am in trouble; incline thine ear unto me: in the day when I call answer me speedily. For my days are consumed like smoke, and my bones are burned as an hearth. My heart is smitten, and withered like grass; so that I forget to eat my bread. By reason of the voice of my groaning my bones cleave to my skin. I am like a pelican of the wilderness: I am like an owl of the desert. I watch, and am as a sparrow alone upon the house top.”

This is s true picture of loneliness. I’m guessing that everyone has felt all alone at some point in their lives. Many feel all alone right now. Maybe you are all alone.

What are some causes for loneliness? What has caused your loneliness?

Once upon a time, there was a boy named Joey. He was very lonely, and he got into trouble a lot. When Joey turned to his “friends”, they thought he wasn’t cool enough to be part of their group. When he turned to his true friends, they weren’t cool enough for him. Joey’s leaders saw potential in him, and encouraged him to serve God. Joey continued to wander through life without purpose or direction, always getting into trouble out of boredom, feeling like nobody accepted him, and that who he was wasn’t good enough for anyone…not even himself. Over time, a good friend entered Joey’s life who loved and accepted Joey for who he was. This friend had an even more difficult time growing up, and understood all about loneliness. Joey and his new friend encouraged each other to be better than either of them were, and their love grew. Joey and this friend eventually got married and made lots of dish bubbles together!

As I look back on my life as a teen, I recognize that my position in life wasn’t to be popular, wasn’t to be athletic and wasn’t to be in the “in” crowd. By trying to be something I wasn’t caused great loneliness and dis-satisfaction. I see my story in many of you teens, and although I can’t go back in time and guide myself (like in the movie “Back to the Future”), I can try to help you conquer your loneliness by asking you to consider the following:

On a scale of 1-10 (1 being low, 10 being high) rate the following:
1. How popular are you with other teens?
2. How well are you accepted by other friends?
3. How well are you accepted by your parents?
4. How prone are you to feeling sorry for yourself?
5. How determined are you to take responsibility for your own life?

My guess is that many of you rated yourselves low in questions 1, 2, 3 & 5, and high on #4. What I want you to see is that it doesn’t matter what your answers are to questions 1, 2 or 3 – what really matters is your answers to 4 & 5.

We recently talked about making good commitments and sticking with them. Here’s another commitment that is VERY worthwhile making…are you ready? Here it is. “I (your name here) commit to stop feeling sorry for myself, no matter what my circumstances, and with God’s help I take responsibility for my own life.”

As a Christian, once you make this commitment, you will stop making decisions based on the approval of others, and start making them based on the approval of the One who designed you and allowed you to be you – our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Living for Him is the ONLY way to true fulfillment. True fulfillment shatters loneliness!

Also, by making this kind of commitment will help you realize that you need to stop “floating” through life, find the purpose that God has for you, and figure out how to fulfill that purpose.

Jeremiah 33:3 says, “Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.” This verse does not say that God will show you ordinary things when you call upon Him, but He will show you GREAT and MIGHTY things…things that you currently don’t even know about…things that will fulfill your life and help you conquer loneliness.

Making Commitments

Often, we get caught up in the moment of decision, and make commitments that later we break. Ecclesiastes 5:5 says, “Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay.” However, scripture is filled with people selling out to God, making strong commitments, then “going for it”. Although we should not break vows, this verse shouldn’t scare us out of being committed to God.

Let’s look at examples of commitments in the Bible:
1. Joshua 24:15, “And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.” This was a decision for life.

2. Esther 4:16, “Go, gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan, and fast ye for me, and neither eat nor drink three days, night or day: I also and my maidens will fast likewise; and so will I go in unto the king, which is not according to the law: and if I perish, I perish." Esther left no provision to turn back

3. Job 2:10, “But he said unto her, Thou speakest as one of the foolish women speaketh. What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil? In all this did not Job sin with his lips.” Job made a conscious decision to not turn against God.

4. David uses the words “I will” numerous times in the Psalms. (31:1, 34:1, 9:1-2, 22:22). In 27:4, notice the time commitment…"all the days of my life".

5. Proverbs is full of instructions that are intended to set the course of young people FOR LIFE! Look at 24:1-5, and be committed to follow 3 things…wisdom, understanding, knowledge. Finish school well – commit to this! I’ve never known a slacker in school to have a good testimony.

WHAT ARE SOME COMMITMENTS YOU SHOULD MAKE?
-find a mate that loves God
-don’t make provision to turn back
-allow your commitments, not your emotions to rule your life. Job 31:1, “I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?”